5 Ways To Find Community

Photo by Samantha Roth

In a world filled with narratives of self love, independence, and individualism, are you struggling to find a lasting community? Of course we want to be our own person and matter in this world. But, in pursuit of these narratives, we are leaving behind a greater calling. The call for community.

Beyond ourselves is something better. Others.

When we take our eyes off of the person in the mirror and all the things we would fix or what we need/want/desire and instead focus on the faces around us, something deep inside our souls shifts. All of that energy we’ be been spending fixated inwardly can now be channeled outwardly. Then the world absolutely changes for good. 

Instead of being consumed by making ourselves stand out, improved, and in no need of help from others, now our desire is for co-laboring and collaboration from one another.

Our desire to be the best is less important in authentic and genuine relationships where everyone wants the best for one another. 

We were created to be together and to put each other first as a community.

If you’re lacking community, here are some suggestions for finding your people.

01 | Start where you are.

Who is around you on a regular basis? Co-worker, spouse, family, etc. Decide to focus on one person and make them feel absolutely important and give them your time and attention. 

02 | Visit a church.

Don’t be late and don’t rush off afterwards. The mingling beforehand and after is key to making friends and finding new people. Don’t give up after one day. Go back and keep trying. Just worshipping and praising the Lord in the same room as others brings such a gift of community. 

03 | Be the one to initiate.

I know it’s hard. And I know it’s discouraging if people say they are busy. Don’t be easily offended and keep trying. Invite, invite, invite! (Also, don’t keep a record of how often you’ve invited someone and how many times they’ve invited you. Keeping a record of “wrongs” is not loving and it’ll build resentment) 

04 | Volunteer.

Give your time to an organization you love and meet new people who share your passion. Try homeless shelters, pregnancy centers, food banks, nursing homes, or the library! There are tons of places that appreciate your time and will bring new souls into your life.

05 | Host.

Opening your home is a great way to build community. These pictures are from a luncheon I hosted recently. I didn’t know many of them super well beforehand but by the end of it we all knew each other better and all enjoyed eating, laughing, and sharing stories. They all had amazing lives and I was so grateful to hear their hearts. 

So let’s all take a deep breath. We don’t have to be alone. We actually weren’t created to be. We need one another and that does not make us weak or co-dependent. If we approach community in a healthy and giving way, our world around us will flourish. And a lush and flourishing world is so much more beautiful than we can ever imagine. It all begins with looking towards someone else instead of ourselves.